He looks and i freeze.
He smiles and im stunned.
He stares and i go weak.
Completely.
He notices that im sleepy even when i thought he wasnt looking.
He notices that im disturbed even though i show no signs.
He notices that im unhappy even when i laugh the loudest i can.
I see his efforts.
I see his faith.
I see his hopes.
I see his dreams.
I see his goals.
I see me in him.
I see us in my future.
Everytime i turn and see that girl in the window staring back at me my heart drops with
The girl in the window,
a 12 year old girl who's world crashes around her without any warning.
Crashed so hard that it knocked her out, erasing any happy memories that she once held on so dearly.
All that remains were the stabbing pain she felt in her heart, in her head.
The painful tears that she'd shed whenever she tries to remember yet all that comes to mind are awful things she has seen, heard and felt.
The girl in the window,
A story of how an innocent little girl who hardly understands life itself was forced to face with the cold, harsh reality of life. Incapable of doing anything to stop the crash. Willingly sitting there and taking the blow.
I want everything to stop.
World stop spinning.
Time stop moving.
Heart stop beating.
Death.
Just to stop feeling.
Just to avoid disappointments.
Just to not feel pain.
I just dont understand what i feel inside me.
How can something so nice make me feel so scared.
How can something so sweet make me feel so sour.
How can something so beautiful make me feel so on edge.
Its like standing on a cliff,
With wind blowing hard,
I stand there trying to keep my balance.
Making sure i dont fall.
But im slipping.
If i fall, i know it'll ba a long fall.
I know it'll be long before i land.
I know when i land its going to hurt.
But somehow i cant get myself to step away from the edge.
The need to feel, to love, to live seem to be pulling me.
Making me take risks that i know will haunt me.
Is this how life's got to be?
Or will i realize in amidst of the fall that im dreaming.
And all ill be landing on is in the arms of the one i depend on.
Then only will i know that i just wont hurt no more.
Your every touch,
Your every move,
Your every look,
Your every stare,
You blow me away,
Into this state of ecstacy,
You make me feel simply blissful.
How do you know so much about me.
Its amazing how you can tell things about me without trying.
Its like you can read my mind.
All i have to do is think it and you'll say it.
Today isnt the first time,
Yet it still amazes me.
I love how you do that.
I love how you read my mind everytime.
Its not hard to keep me happy,
I dont ask for much.
Make me smile,
Make me laugh,
Care for me,
Make me feel safe,
Look at me,
Smile at me,
Kiss me,
Hold me close,
Listen to my dreams,
Tell me yours,
Hold my hand,
Trace circles on my hand,
Keep me in your mind,
Make me the only one.
Its the little things you do that captures my heart.
The things you've said to me,
Everytime i remember them,
Brings a smile to my face,
Keeps my heart calm.
Its amazing how a few words can mean so much.
Its amazing how a few words can melt my heart.
Me,
I will not get insecure.
I will not care about it.
I will not look for it.
I will not take to heart anything.
You,
You'll do what you want.
You'll talk to whoever you want.
You go out with whoever you want.
You'll know your limits.
Because if limits are crossed,
And i find out,
Consider me gone,
So lets keep the peace.
Right from the start,
You were a thieve,
You stole my heart,
And Im your willing victim.
I let you see the parts of me that werent all that pretty,
And with every touch you fixed them.
- pink.
You treat me like no one ever has,
Made me feel like how a girl should feel,
Made me your princess,
Made me feel just like a princess.
Always there for me,
Held my hand anytime you could,
Brushed my hair,
Let me sleep on your lap when you drive,
Held me close when the world is crashing around me,
Never letting me do anything you could do for me,
How do i resist such tender loving,
What more can a girl ask for.
Thank you.
I must not start feeling this way.
This is how i always am.
I become weak and i succumb to my mind games,
Demon stay away,
I must start anew.
I am no longer who i use to be.
Horrid dreams,
Haunts my mind,
Questions spinning in my head,
Messing with me the whole day through.
I see your eyes light up at the mention of her name,
I think i know,
She's unreachable,
So you settle,
Settle for me.
Im just another second choice arent i?
My mind is messing with me again.
I hate this feeling.
I know you love me,
I know you care,
But would you choose me over her?
Its something i dont want to know.
Yet its still in my mind,
Haunting me in my dreams.
You came into my life,
Appeared out of the blue,
Knowing me like the back of your hand,
Accepting who i really was,
Loving who i really am,
Wanting all i ever wanted,
Promising me the life i always wanted.
Tell me its not just a dream,
Tell me this is for real,
Tell me this is it.
Be true,
Be nice,
My heart cant take another heartache.
Life turns and twists us.
In a million direction, in a million ways.
Who would have thought i would be where i am today.
Definately not me.
At the age of 23,
I became a new person.
And i lead a different life.
Im liberated. And im happy. Finally.
